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Celebrity Reactions To Theory That The Psst Sound When You Open A Soda Is Really Ghosts Escaping
A new theory involving spirits trapped inside soda cans has Hollywood in an uproar. According to a new study released by the Harvard School of Haunting, it has been revealed that the sound once thought to be escaping pressure is actually ancient soda ghosts being released into the wild. The scientific community has reacted to […] More
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WOW: Local Man Gets Adequate Amount Of Napkins At Drive-Thru
Local man Dale Grimble may just be the luckiest guy you’ll meet. After recently winning $25 on a $2 lottery scratch-off, Dale has once again hit the jackpot. On an unsuspecting Sunday, Dale visited his local McDonalds and placed an order that would change his life. “It was two cheeseburgers, fries and one of those […] More
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Husband Tries To Pitch In, Finds New Ways To Be Wrong
What started out as a simple load of laundry has ended with blood, tears and a new appreciation for a typically mundane chore. In an attempt to both please his wife and also have clean towels, Rick Stevens embarked on what he now refers to as one of the worst experiences of his life. It […] More
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If You Can’t Take The Heat, Then Don’t Read These Tweets About Kitchens 🔥
Ah yes, the kitchen. Home of your favorite snacks, a place to gather with family and your second favorite room in which to cry. We’ve all seen them so they’re very relatable which makes them RIPE for parody! Now without further Mountain Dew… me: ah, now I will drift gently off to dreamland. refrigerator: I […] More
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Keenan Thompson’s Reactions Are The Glue That Holds SNL Together
While not every sketch on Saturday Night Live is a home run, there’s one thing you can always count on: Keenan Thompson being Keenan Thompson. A staple on SNL and the longest serving cast member in the show’s history, it seems like his default role is just reacting to awkward situations and let me say… I’m […] More
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These 5 Life Hacks Will Help You Live Like A Billionaire
Ok, so you’re no Jeff Bezos. But that shouldn’t stop you from living like a boss. Check out these 5 tips that real billionaires use every single day! 1. Hire A Personal Assistant Why are you wasting time opening your own caviar? For just $35,000-$45,000 a year, you can have your very own personal assistant […] More
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New ABC show “Fish Tank” helps “business owners” raise capital
After the overwhelming success of ABC’s hit show “Shark Tank”, executives at the network began searching for a new angle to expand the show even further. Realizing that not every company needs millions to launch their business, the Disney subsidiary has announced production on their newest foray into investor based television: Fish Tank. Fish Tank, […] More
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Sit Back & Enjoy: These Are April’s Finest Tweets
[alternate universe where jesus christ's name was jeffy spaghetti] ME: *hears some horrible news* jeffy spaghetti — Ally Gator 🐊 (@notacroc) April 7, 2017 [House Hunters episode] HUSBAND: I'm a freelance hamster trainer WIFE: And I tune harmonicas part-time HUSBAND: Our budget is $950K — Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) April 19, 2017 [inventor of the zoo] *sees […] More
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Sean Spicer Asks Press Conference To Hold Him Instead
Things took an awkward turn at the White House briefing this morning when press secretary Sean Spicer finally broke down in tears. After his first 100 days as the face of the Trump administration, Spicer looked as though he is beginning to feel the full weight of the job. “I’ve been spinning so many stories that I’m actually dizzy.” said Spicer. […] More
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Customer Service Representative Really Appreciates Your Patience
While technology has made vast leaps over the past 20 years, the one thing we haven’t been able to find more of is time. That’s why Sarah wants to thank you for your patience. She appreciates your business and understands how busy you are. If she could just have a few moments to lookup your account. […] More
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Trump Organization Releases New Cologne: Hot Garbage
From the fairways of southern Florida to the halls of the Whitehouse, now you too an smell just like a Trump. Hot Garbage, the new scent from Trump International captures the essence of the entire Trump family in one, nauseating aroma. Unbutton your sport coat and bask in the medley of Aqua Velva and Drakkar Noir mixed with a […] More
