Sweeping The Nation: Fantasy Fantasy Football

Why play for money when you can just talk about wanting to?

It’s the buzz around offices across the United States. Men huddled together, all talking about one thing: Fantasy Football.

“Have you guys ever played on those sites like DraftKings?” says Steve from accounting.

The men all talk about how they’ve thought about trying it. Even how if they did, they’d probably win big like those guys on the commercials.

“Yeah, I’ve picked some big winners in my league of four friends. I bet I’d rake it on there.” remarks Paul, who has had the same shitty job for 12 years.

“Totally. How hard could it really be?” adds Rick who can’t figure out his gmail account.

It’s not as if prize pools of millions of dollars would bring out actual professionals. You’re friends and coworkers are all pretty sure that they would nail it. You know, if they tried it.

“I’m sure there is like software that would help you pick the best lineup. Easy money.” says John who also claims to have a “system” for slot machines.

In walks the douchey guy in the office. “I’ve played and won like $100 bucks!” The guys all gather around. “Whoa. That’s crazy.” they all say. Obviously the $480 Douchey Mark has played through isn’t worth mentioning. He WON $100.

So sit back arm chair quarterbacks. It’s better to lose the remote in the cushions than it is to lose a bunch of money thinking you’re smarter than real gamblers and handicappers.

Besides, why put your money where your mouth is when you can just run your mouth?

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