Kipzio Staff
Excuse my French but…WHAT THE FFFFFFFFFbaguette
— penjamin. (@upsidedowntrash) March 31, 2017
Hi, welcome to assumptions club. I think we all know why we're here.
— MehGyver (@AndrewNadeau0) March 9, 2017
[being murdered by cows]
more like (finger quotes) "moodered" amirite
[the other farm animals immediately join in, even some corn is mad]— Ygrene (@Ygrene) March 31, 2017
[commercial]
"Is there a dull film on your dishes?"
Me: [looking closely] Holy shit is that The English Patient?— Bread Savage (@papasuncle) March 31, 2017
if only there were a movie about the redemptive path of a broken boxer
— batkaren (@batkaren) April 1, 2017
[god creating hedgehogs]
"what if circles could stab you"— Fred Delicious (@Fred_Delicious) March 30, 2017
ME: 34 across says ‘breakfast drink if it lived in Springfield’
HER: Try OJ Simpson
ME: *rubbing my temples* christ Sharon they already did— Cap'n Kal (@captainkalvis) March 5, 2017
Remember that Andy Grammer song about how he was only a single drink away from definitely cheating on his wife
— Kate McGarry (@k8mcgarry) March 28, 2017
{my first time as a baseball coach}
Ok. Listen up. Just get out there and try not to fall asleep— Kim Monte (@KimmyMonte) March 25, 2017
DEBATE CAPTAIN: You're off the debate team
ME: No I'm not
DEBATE CAPTAIN: Damn. Where the hell was this guy at regionals?
— Nathan Usher (@thenatewolf) March 17, 2017
what if gyms are just a conspiracy to keep maroon 5 relevant
— Julia Bush (@jabush) March 8, 2017
[commercial for boiling water]
*me just cramming hard spaghetti in my mouth and crunching*
narrator: there has to be a better way
— andrew chamings (@AndrewChamings) March 6, 2017
