Sit. Rollover. Now Enjoy The Best Dog Tweets On The Planet.

Man’s best friend? You’re damn right, but dogs also make for some hilarious tweet material. These are the bestest dog tweets on the planet as decided by us after an exhaustive 20 minute search. Enjoy!

1. This One's Gold…

Her: You spent our entire life savings on dogs

Me: They're golden retrievers, Karen. They retrieve gold. I did it for us
— There's No Godzilla (@TheresNoGodzila) August 29, 2016

by Kipzio Staff November 8, 2016, 5:49 pm

3 points

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Total votes: 3

Upvotes: 3

Upvotes percentage: 100.000000%

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Downvotes percentage: 0.000000%

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2. Must See TV

SUBWAY EMPLOYEE: What would you like-

ME: I'D LIKE TO CREATE A SHOW ABOUT A DOG WHO FLIPS HOUSES

SE: -on your sandwich?

ME: FIXER PUPPER
— Kel (@ohheyohhihello) July 18, 2016

by Kipzio Staff November 7, 2016, 11:45 pm

1 point

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Total votes: 1

Upvotes: 1

Upvotes percentage: 100.000000%

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Downvotes percentage: 0.000000%

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3. DOG 911

DOG 911: what's ur emergency

DOG: MY BALL IS UNDER THE COUCH

DOG 911: u try barking at it?

DOG: IT DIDN'T WORK

DOG 911: OMG

DOG: OMG
— Reverend Scott (@Reverend_Scott) June 12, 2016

by Kipzio Staff November 7, 2016, 11:51 pm

1 point

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Total votes: 1

Upvotes: 1

Upvotes percentage: 100.000000%

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Downvotes percentage: 0.000000%

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4. Home Security

burglar: [breaks into house]
my dog: "BARK BARK BARK BARK"
burglar: [strokes dog's head]
my dog: "i have misjudged this very nice man"
— k e e t (@KeetPotato) December 22, 2015

by Kipzio Staff November 8, 2016, 12:00 am

1 point

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Upvotes percentage: 100.000000%

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5. You’re Out!

[dog baseball]
Dog Umpire: ball 4 that’s a walk
Dog Batter: *excitedly brings out leash*
— don't FROget to VOte (@fro_vo) June 14, 2016

by Kipzio Staff November 8, 2016, 12:10 am

1 point

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Total votes: 1

Upvotes: 1

Upvotes percentage: 100.000000%

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Downvotes percentage: 0.000000%

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6. Fact:

the first person to pet a dog was probably like "dang. i don't think im gonna be able to stop"
— chuuch (@ch000ch) August 22, 2015

by Kipzio Staff November 8, 2016, 12:14 am

1 point

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Total votes: 1

Upvotes: 1

Upvotes percentage: 100.000000%

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Downvotes percentage: 0.000000%

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7. Good Boy.

"Sit"
dog sits

"Down"
dog lays down on floor

"Play Dead"
dog graduates college, finds job, gets married and has kids
— Jay (@theshamingofjay) February 13, 2015

by Kipzio Staff November 7, 2016, 11:54 pm

0 points

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Total votes: 0

Upvotes: 0

Upvotes percentage: 0.000000%

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Downvotes percentage: 0.000000%