Sean Spicer Asks Press Conference To Hold Him Instead

He’s been through a lot.

Things took an awkward turn at the White House briefing this morning when press secretary Sean Spicer finally broke down in tears.

After his first 100 days as the face of the Trump administration, Spicer looked as though he is beginning to feel the full weight of the job.

“I’ve been spinning so many stories that I’m actually dizzy.” said Spicer.

After several minutes of gentle sobbing, Spicer curled up in a little ball and agreed to take a few questions from the media.

Not wanting to worsen the already embarrassing spectacle, reporters proceeded to ask the weeping shell of a man his favorite foods and tv shows.

This seemed to help for a few minutes until someone callously mentioned Saturday Night Live, causing Spicer to have what one reporter, who asked to remain anonymous, referred to as a full on hissy fit.

“He was screaming, but also crying… like really hard. We all felt really bad actually.”

BBC Reporter Mike McNeary said this was certainly a first for him.

“I think the worst part was when he asked us to each name something we liked about him. I mean… he’s a nice enough guy and all, but how do you answer a middle aged man when he asks you that?”

Spicer eventually fell asleep from all the yelling and crying, but not before making everyone promise they would attend his next birthday party.

Asked for comment, the White House said they “Did not want to wake him just yet.”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *